I picked up Twilight to read on the plane ride to South Carolina, not because I was interested, but because it was long and had big print (so intelligent, right?). I ended up sleeping on the trip, and didn’t even pick up the book. I completely forgot about it for a few days. When we [...]
Scene: I work at a wireless retailer, and, as a perk, certain employees get lines of service paid for by the company. Each month, I get a detailed bill for each line, which includes what people downloaded. I was going through that today…
Me: Somehow, I don’t think “Jungle Sex” movie clips are appropriate to be [...]
Boss: …everyone got sick while we were there, even Betty*! (Betty is the boss’ one year old daughter)
Me: Aww, that sucks! You guys finally get away to relax and even Betty got sick?
Boss: Yeah… we thought it was the food at first, but Betty’s only on the boob and Jennifer* (Boss’ wife) wasn’t sick yet!
Me: [...]
Dear Tampon Makers (oh yes, I went there):
I understand that to reduce my risk of toxic shock syndrome, I should only use the lowest “absorbency” needed. However, your chart confuses me. I should use the Super when my “flow” is 9-12 grams, and the Super Plus when its 12-15 grams. So, pray tell, Tampax… how [...]
Her eye is like that because she had a malignant tumor over it that we had removed a while back. The tumor was in an awkward position and the vet had to cut pretty deep into her forehead to get it out. The resulting stitch job left her eye pulled way up, and it never [...]
Ok, so here’s the things you need to know:
My mom moved to Idaho in November, and didn’t tell me until two weeks before she left. Good times.
My aunt has undergone surgery for breast cancer and is now undergoing radiation treatments.
I got a Nikon D60 for Christmas, thanks to some savings bonds I didn’t know that [...]
I totally need to start writing here again. I have things I want to say, things to get off of my chest. Will be here soon… I hope.
Purchase the following items at the same time:
Deli SandwichRockstar energy drink1 box of super tampons1 box of regular tampons1 bag of menthol cough drops1 bottle of Febreeze1 mini sewing kit
I tried to tell her I was McGuyver. She just looked at me funny.
Alternate title: Why Sex Ed Should Be Taught In Schools
Jeff: I have a headache.Me: I have cramps.J: Well, that’s good it’s coming. Because of last night. *wink wink*M: I’m already on it. But what are you talking about?J: Y’know. Last night. *wink wink nudge nudge*M: Uhhh, why would that matter?J: I don’t know. Doesn’t it [...]
